{"id":117,"date":"2017-12-21T22:53:26","date_gmt":"2017-12-21T21:53:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/aubistrotdesames.wordpress.com\/?p=117"},"modified":"2026-05-20T11:27:17","modified_gmt":"2026-05-20T09:27:17","slug":"ma-vie-de-reve","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lauremartin.fr\/lebistrotdesames\/2017\/12\/21\/ma-vie-de-reve\/","title":{"rendered":"Ma vie de r\u00eave"},"content":{"rendered":"

Cat Stevens – Wild world<\/a><\/p>\n

Il fait beau. Non… Il pleut. Les petites gouttes glissent doucement sur la vitre, se fondent dans celles qu’elles atteignent, et glissent encore, de plus en plus vite.<\/p>\n

Sous la couette, envelopp\u00e9e de la chaleur de mon corps, je me laisse fascin\u00e9e par la lumi\u00e8re qui joue avec la pluie. Je ferme les yeux et, lorsque je les rouvre, les gouttes sont toujours l\u00e0, qui coulent, et coulent encore. Je ferme \u00e0 nouveau, rouvre. Toujours l\u00e0. Il y a de l’\u00e9ternit\u00e9 dans ces gouttes.<\/p>\n

Je me sens infinie, et je pense \u00e0 mes mois f\u0153tus<\/em>. Chaleur douce, lumi\u00e8re jouant avec le liquide, invariable dans le temps, d’ailleurs je ne sais pas ce qu’est le temps. Je suis. J’ignore le besoin, mon corps se d\u00e9veloppe sans que j’agisse, et les lueurs rouges bercent mon regard. Je ne sais rien, et \u00e7a me va. Je sais tout? Je ne sais pas…<\/p>\n

Pourquoi tout cela s’est-il arr\u00eat\u00e9? Pourquoi a-t-il fallu quitter cette douceur? Ai-je particip\u00e9 \u00e0 ce choix, ou sont-ce les hormones de Maman qui m’ont accueillie puis fichue dehors? Est-ce celle-l\u00e0, la trahison originelle? Flotter dans le n\u00e9ant d’un ventre maternel et se faire expulser dans le froid glacial, les spots agressifs et les mains techniciennes. Ca me glace et je pleure. Alors c’est \u00e7a la vie sur Terre? Mon \u00e2me, tu t’es tromp\u00e9e, je ne peux pas avoir de mission ici, il fait trop froid dans les c\u0153urs… Repartons s’il-te-pla\u00eet, emm\u00e8ne-moi loin d’ici…<\/p>\n

Tu le sais, toi mon \u00e2me, que j’ai essay\u00e9! Je les ai tous \u00e9cout\u00e9s, j’ai \u00e9t\u00e9 bien sage… Alors pourquoi le P\u00e8re No\u00ebl n’a-t-il pas rempli mon c\u0153ur de joie? Pourquoi, quand j’ai donn\u00e9 mon c\u0153ur avec mon corps, on n’a pris que mon corps? Pourquoi, quand j’ai donn\u00e9 mon temps et mon intelligence, on s’est servi jusqu’\u00e0 ce qu’il n’en reste plus? Pourquoi, lorsque j’ai donn\u00e9 ma confiance, on m’a trahie? Avais-je la m\u00e9moire si courte!? D\u00e8s mon arriv\u00e9e ici j’ai senti le froid partout; j’aurais d\u00fb fuir dans l’instant, arr\u00eater ce c\u0153ur minuscule, et repartir danser avec les \u00e9toiles. Pourtant, je suis l\u00e0, et sans rel\u00e2che je cherche la chaleur… O\u00f9 es-tu? O\u00f9 est le radiateur, la chaudi\u00e8re, la chemin\u00e9e, le foyer? O\u00f9 est ma maison? Je suis perdue…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Il fait beau. Non… Il pleut. Les petites gouttes glissent doucement sur la vitre, se fondent dans celles qu’elles atteignent, et glissent encore, de plus en plus vite…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[19],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-117","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-moi"],"yoast_head":"\nMa vie de r\u00eave - Le bistrot des \u00e2mes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/lauremartin.fr\/lebistrotdesames\/2017\/12\/21\/ma-vie-de-reve\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Ma vie de r\u00eave - Le bistrot des \u00e2mes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Il fait beau. 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